![]() ![]() Memories make you cry and long for your loved one. In the days, weeks, months and even years following the death of a loved one, all memories involving your loved one usually bring enormous pain. Was the person never spoken about again? Is the topic all together avoided? Do you feel unsure to bring up the person’s name for fear of making others uncomfortable or sad? Or does your family carry out any kind of rituals that help you to remember and honor your lost loved ones? To get to the memories, you must pass through the pain. Take a moment to consider how you or your family has handled the subject of remembering those who have died. “They are not forgotten, those who live on in the hearts of those they leave behind.” I suppose I made it a promise to myself that I would find a way to keep the memory of my brothers alive but how I would do it was not as clear in the beginning years as it is now. One of my favorite quotes that I latched onto when my brothers died (you can read more about my experience with loss here) was a quote written on a postcard I received: ![]() They are no longer physically here but your connection with them, to the degree that you are open to it, will change and evolve over time. As the years pass, finding ways to keep your loved one’s memory alive can bring comfort and a sense that they are still very much a part of your life. It is heartbreaking enough that they are no longer physically in your life. When my family experienced deaths, the subject of remembering the people who had died, much less talking about them, was met with trepidation and awkwardness. ![]() Having been brought up in an English-American family, the traditions around having any kind of formal way of remembering dead loved ones was completely lacking in my family. I have always been fascinated by the Mexican holiday of Dia De Los Muertos, in which people publicly remember, honor and connect with those that have died. We call it the Final Death.”–line from the movie, Coco When there’s no one left in the living world who remembers you, you disappear from this world. ![]()
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